“The life of man is a self-evolving circle, which, from a ring imperceptibly small, rushes on all sides outwards to new and larger circles, and that without end. The extent to which this generation of circles, wheel without wheel, will go, depends on the force or truth of the individual soul.”
― Ralph Waldo Emerson, Essays: Circles
1st Cycle: Seconds
The First Cycle is the transient moments; moments of pleasure, moments of pain—the ticking seconds of the clock, leaving, arriving… leaving, arriving… momentarily, and each is welcomed by the other, in a never-ending dance of pleasure, of excitement, of pain, of boredom, & of strain… Yet, the seconds grinds as harsh as the mill; Transience rends the most adamant of souls… and each second accompanying you to the other, shall only lead you in an ever-exhausting chain of despair…
“To finish the moment, to find the journey’s end in every step of the road, to live the greatest number of good hours, is wisdom.”
― Ralph Waldo Emerson, Essays: Experience
“You know the sound of two hands clapping; tell me, what is the sound of one hand?”
― Zen Kōan
2nd Cycle: Days
The Second Cycle is the bane of the passing days, the sweat of daily toil under the searing sun, & the following restlessness embracing each night residing between the fear of what is to come, & regret for what is long past… Each day has its own night, and each night is as vigilant of the pains of the day…
The Day is the herald of a long lost promise that you need to fulfill: The promise of being the One to the Other; of being a fulfilling other in the lives of each one… & though you are only met by the pains and dissatisfactions of one or another… or even yourself… You keep toiling, until you stop…
Yet each Day is the herald, as well as the witness to that promise, that is ever lost amidst the strife of your daily life…
“When you see a man on top of a mountain, just remember he didn’t fall there,”
― Paul H. Dunn
“When you reach the top of the mountain, keep climbing.”
― Zen Kōan
3rd Cycle: Months
The Third Cycle is the accumulation of human strife, the agile intents & relentless scheming of the human mind to conquer being over each month; the routines, the protocols, the politics, the stratagems…
Drawing ever closer to an unyielding and unattainable prosperity; But the never-ending strife towards perfect prosperity is only the descent towards persistent poverty. But as we know― true civilization― was deeply rooted in the Soil… in cultivating goods out of the Earth. & as we got goods, we knew good, & then Man got lost, because he wanted Nature for himself not for itself― industrializing it into machinations of doom. & there it all started; the moment we knew goodness led to centuries of us forgetting Godliness.
But the Secret of the Soil lain still, into stillness itself, it is not in the planning or the scheming—It has never been in the engineering of machines that conquers Nature. It has chiefly primed through patience, and through patience alone… This is the true secret of the Soil… and of the Months… Patience…
“If you came this way,
Taking any route, starting from anywhere,
At any time or at any season,
It would always be the same:
You are here to kneel”
― T.S. Eliot, Little Gidding
“We will grieve not, rather find
Strength in what remains behind
…..
In years that bring the philosophic mind.”
― William Wordsworth, Ode: Intimations of Immortality from Recollections of Early Childhood
4th Cycle: Years
The Fourth Cycle is the inevitable grinding of the years upon one’s nerves, the scars and scorches, then, painted by the Art of aging on the canvas of One’s own skin, drawn by the endlessly flowing ink of the years, flowing endlessly down to each vein, slowly leaving their marks upon One’s flesh and soul, & leaving one question behind, “Am I still myself?”
Because the river flowing is never the river flowing. and Man is never Man… Time cracks open things and binds them back again into Oneness… Time is the ultimate Destroyer and Builder… and if you stand long enough in front of the mirror, You will realize that you are not the One who chose to stand in the first place…
But there lies the question, Are you the One who chose to stand? or the One who stood still all this time?!
“Not the wind, not the flag; mind is moving.”
― Zen Kōan
“One often makes a remark and only later sees how true it is.”
― Ludwig Wittgenstein, Journals
5th Cycle: Lifetimes
The Fifth Cycle is the fullness of forgetfulness between each decade & the other, Decades between lessons learnt & lessons unlearnt, into the dust of time; all is lost, all is regained, and searching for your past self is only losing your present, while clinging to your present self is pushing away your future self who is anticipating your arrival. You start to know that you can be the Other, in another time and another place…
You start realizing, that… That was never you who was a 10 years old child, and neither that was you as a 20 years old adolescent, You are not the youth, you were in your 30’s nor the Man you were in your 40’s,…
You are Another…
So, you live and die simultaneously and slowly, over each year, so that each Decade within your Life must be a lifetime… Yet deep down, the deepest parts of you live in tandem, as one, across the decades and lifetimes, those parts of you can still talk to God. Not the one you’ve always defined through the years, but the One who knew you, nonetheless… These parts within you are the only ones… who transcend yourself…
“The courage to be is rooted in the God who appears when God has disappeared in the anxiety of doubt”
― Paul Tillich, The Courage to Be
“The unconsciousness of man is the consciousness of God.”
― Henry David Thoreau, A Week on the Concord and Merrimack Rivers “Thursday”
6th Cycle: Life & Death
The Sixth Cycle is what has been before being born, & what will be after dying, Time veiled before seducing the elderly, Time lost and Time found, transcending Transcending, becoming Becoming, Out of Time, as free as trees and as primal as the oceans, as true as the face of the Earth. You reach reaching & find finding, & the gateway? It is not what you did, who you were, or what you knew… But the True Gate is the Gateless: The One who will meet you as a long lost lifetime friend, almost as yourself welcoming yourself as you meet… and then… there will be no “then’s”, no “when’s”, no “where’s” no “why’s”, and no “hence”… There will only be the Awe of the Meeting… and The Awe of the meeting is only matched by the tenderness and Love you bid each other as you meet into an never-ending dance of Glory… & That Glory in the Meeting is the meeting itself…
“The meaning of life, i.e. the meaning of the world, we can call God.”
― Ludwig Wittgenstein, Journals
“All is always Now”
― T.S. Eliot, Burnt Norton
7th Cycle: Now
The Seventh & Last Cycle is “Now”, “Here & Now”, having passed through each cycle;
then you are “Now”, & in the Now, you realise that you do not only flow through time,
That time flows through you…
In the “Now” Seconds have no dominion any more, there is no ripping of the Self; “Now” you are the flow…
There is no unfulfilled wishes of the Day; For “Now” you are free of wishing…
There is no scheming or planning through each month for prosperity; “Now” is your prosperity…
There is no change in you across the years; “Now” is the Change…
There is no estrangement to who you were each decade; “Now” You are the Same…
There is no death or afterlife, Because “Now” you have died to all what is living to truly live for all who are dying…
“Now” you are free…
“To arrive where you are, to get from where you are not,
You must go by a way wherein there is no ecstasy.
In order to arrive at what you do not know
You must go by a way which is the way of ignorance.
In order to possess what you do not possess
You must go by the way of dispossession.
In order to arrive at what you are not
You must go through the way in which you are not.
And what you do not know is the only thing you know
And what you own is what you do not own
And where you are is where you are not.”
― T.S. Eliot, East Coker
Each Cycle starts the other, and starts itself again,…
If One becomes aware, he begins the final cycle as early as the first,
and if One begins the final cycle at any time,
One breaks free from the first one, and consequently from all of them,
even for a split second,…
Is the goal, then, to begin the final cycle?
Is the goal to break free from the first?
If, so, then one is doomed to begin again,…
But the goal is not to break free,…
But to get as deep as can be into the labyrinth,
to be completely mired into the story,
and then, realize… there was none,…
There were no cycles,…
There was only One,
and the Other was there to lead you astray, for a brief moment…
So that, you would fear not,
and giggle as a child enjoying enjoyment…
Knowing; there was no obstacle on the road that was not of the road itself,
That; there was no Other that is totally separate from One itself,
So that, you can really know that, there is only One…
So you meet…
across all cycles… and welcome the One through every whirl…
Living inside out… without and within…
B.S., July 07
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