Out of the Last Goodbye; between the brinks of dying & being reborn

There it was; at my sight — new cross-roads, a new lesson, a new goodbye, & a new hello. But most of all what really gained a clearer picture & scenery was this narrative  —That story inside of me. After all, Life has given me a new story to tell… My Story.

I remember I used to resist the winds as they flush the strokes of the unrequited emotions within me. I used to combat that weight of the crushing waves upon the barriers of my heart. I used to resist that, to embrace it with a challenging manner & to fight the winds and the waves. To fearlessly defy nature & to tease it. To endlessly fall for the breeze of autumn & the frost of winter, the daylight spring & the summer nights. To smile the days hello & kiss the nights goodbye. To sing the birds & the words of a thousand without knowing what they really mean. To either be so indifferent or so keen. To surpass life and back in words & phrases I have never really possessed. I sang drunk & wrote drunk without my heart getting drowned or sunk. To feel ceaselessly without hurt. To think endlessly without worry.
I used to be invincible. Or so I thought or felt that days.
I used to be none other than me.

Yet Now I resist no more. Now I combat no more. The pieces of my soul are so shattered that they have filled the climes and the firmament & together. They have filled the waves & the seas that now all my reality  — all what I am, all what you are, & all what it is… they now flow as One. I renounced what I am; the follies & the wisdom, the laughter & the tears, the joy & the dull, all pride & the shame. I renounced all what became of me to embrace what I am. I renounced me to embrace myself. For I realized there is much more to myself than what I am. There is much more to myself than what I perceive & that story is endless. For the triviality of what you see is only sensed once the abundance of what you are is believed.
& that was the best & worst of all lessons.
That I am multitude. That entirety of nature, people & all what is. That is all what I am.

That when I surpassed time & identity. I became everyone & everything. I became lost yet found, hidden yet visible, absent yet present, dormant yet vivid. My presence was as ethereal as of the light in the morning & as severe as of the hues of black of the night. I ceased to resist now. I am combat no more.
I became everything & nothing. I became it all yet I became no more.



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